BAGGY

HAT. FAUX NOSE RING. URBAN OUTFITTERS

DRESS. ZARA

SNEAKERS. REEBOKS 

Nudes

skirt- go jane

top, purse, booties - zara

hat- urban outfitters

I live in an eternal summer named Florida. 90% of the time it is blistering hot. You can't step outside without immediately breaking into a sweat, and  not a "I'm a lady, I glisten" type of sweat. It's more of a boob, vag, and ass sweat. Sweating in general is bad enough, sweating in those said places is horrid. Than you have days like today. When the weather is puuurrrfffecctt, perfect, and all you want to do is sit under a tree and watch sway in the wind. 

Not That Kind of Girl- book review

 

I wasn’t sure how I would feel about this book. I often read reviews before starting a new book, (although, I try not to let the reviews weigh too heavily on whether I actually decide to read or not read a book) and the reviews of Dunham’s Not That Type of Girl were mixed, to say the least. 

However, I figured that since I enjoy her TV show GIRLS so much (for reasons I have yet to understand), her book would most likely be enjoyable as well, so I went for it.

I am very glad I did.

Some read the book and saw it as a time waster. They considered it page after page of random and thus useless information presented in no detectable order. Vapid.

Some read it and were taken aback by what they consider “TMI”.

I read it and was immediately struck by her blatant honesty.

Her fearlessness.

She is an open book, and I found that refreshing.

One reads it and receives a strong sense of who she is, for better or for worse. She presents her good and her bad. No sugarcoating. Nothing is off limits. Nothing is hidden.

I found myself admiring her for that. Even envying her fearlessness.

How much easier my world would be if I were just able to embrace myself, present my whole self every time without shame, without thinking twice, instead of hiding so much of who I am behind false pretenses and made up personality traits. I spend so much energy trying to guess who people want me to be and so much more trying to become that person every time I am around them.

It is exhausting, it is a defense mechanism I sorely wish I didn’t feel to need.

Dunham opens herself up to judgement, her book and her words shout “here I am! take me or leave me! Either way it’s all good.”

I want that attitude.  I feel like a true connection with others can only be formed if both parties are being truly honest about who they are. If they are both playing roles, if they are both pretending than the relationship (friendship or otherwise) is just as false as the image of themselves they are presenting.

Here’s a little personal tale: In high school, every night, I  would cry myself to sleep because I had no idea who I was. Everyday I would morph into the person I thought would receive the most positive reactions, and every night I would regret it. For me, it wasn’t as easy as “just be yourself!”, I couldn’t show the world who I was because I had no idea myself. I would just pick up bits and pieces of other’s personality and idiosyncrasies and work them into myself, dropping and changing parts depending on whom I was around at that moment.

I didn’t know who I was, but I had an idea of who I wasn’t.

Dunham knows who she is. She is honest about who she is to both the reader and herself.

I can say that I am not even sure I would like myself if I were to come in touch with who I truly am.

I know that I am a compulsive people pleaser. It is the one thing that I hate about myself, and yet the one thing I can not seem to change. I feel I would hate myself even more if people were not constantly pleased with me.

Dunham does not have that problem.

Some have dubbed her “the voice of our generation”. I don’t know if that’s true, but I also can’t say that it isn’t.  

It's true that many of subjects she writes about I can’t connect with. Such as sex, the casual attitude she has toward it and the same goes for the drugs. However, I do understand her need for both, she says that she “...stuffed herself with substances to make being out in the world with people my own age a little bit easier.  To lessen the space between me and everyone else. I was hungry to be seen.”

I get that.

Having someone else describe the insecurity that I am always carrying with me makes me feel less pathetic, less abnormal.

She also comments on college. How she was so eager to learn at first, how she was A+, do everything right, go above and beyond type of student at first, and how that quickly fizzled when she found the “rewards weren’t enough to keep me on task, and life got in the way.”

Oh yea, I have been there. I am there. Shit, I practically live there.

Dunham describes the feeling of loss she has when she thinks about her student days, although, she has problems pinpointing why she feels this way.

I share similar feelings with her on this. I came to the conclusion that it’s because academia failed me. I had so much hope for it, so much desire. It disappointed me, horribly.  Professors gave busy work instead of  assignments that actually pertained to the class at hand. Figuring maybe if they bury you in meaningless assignments, you wouldn’t notice how horribly inadequate they were to be in front of a classroom. 

We notice. Incompetence isn’t easy to hide. 

Professors that make a million illegible marks on your paper, and when you are finally able to chase them down for some explanations, they are unable to remember why, let alone read what they wrote. 

 

Professors that fail you on your oral report solely because you didn’t dress up as a character or present it as a play as if we were in kindergarten (I shit you not).

Professors that could not give two fucks about whether or not you show up for class, or do the assignments, because they are barely present themselves, everyone passes.

I know these are shitty professors because I had an amazing one once. 

He was an Asian professor who taught using the Socratic method. It was a class on existentialism. My first philosophy class. I had never taken philosophy before, but in my eagerness I skipped right over Intro to Philosophy and signed up for Existentialism. 

 

Best impulsive decision ever.

He would spend some time in front of the classroom talking, walking up and down the aisles, sitting in the empty desks among us. Only writing keywords on the board, so you really had to pay attention to what he was saying, which wasn’t difficult because what he was saying was always interesting. It wasn’t memorized or just a regurgitation of last night's readings.

It was thought provoking, and always led to a deeper understanding of the work. He would randomly call on students and ask them questions based on the lecture or reading, but not in an intimidating way, in a way that made you feel as though you were adding to the grandeur of the class discussion. 

He would call you on your bullshit, he was stern, but just. You couldn’t fake it with him, and he didn’t want students quoting back the book. He really wanted us to understand, to learn. NOT to memorize. I have never learned so much in my life. I have never felt so proud of myself for receiving a passing grade. The class was immensely challenging, but in the best way ever, in a way that supported true growth. It wasn’t difficult just for the sake of being difficult. There was no busy work. The assignments were few, but when there were assignments they contributed greatly to the class. They were of substance, not tedious and trivial. I had to buy two extra books that were not needed for the class just to understand the mandatory texts.

I had never been happier.

My intense desire to learn and grow was fulfilled. My gratitude toward this teacher is infinite.

I've never had an experience like that again.

Dunham may not be for everyone, but that is only because she does not water herself down to be more palatable for the masses. Which is what so many of us tend to do on a daily basis, water our personalities down. She presents her raw, unrefined self, and I think there is something beautiful about that if only because it is so rare.

grey & tan

jumpsuit, coat, bag- Zara

sneakers- Reebok

Despite how difficult it is to use the restroom in them, I always love to have a few jumpsuit, playsuits and/ or rompers at hand for lazy days. You just throw them on, toss on an accessory or two and bam, you're out the house.

simple

top, skirt, necklace- zara 

sneakers- reeboks

nothing like matching your top and sneakers for clean, simple look. 

Comfort & Ease

Jeans, top- Zara

Sneakers- Adidas

Motorcycle jacket- Nasty Gal

Comfort and ease is the name of the game. I need outfits that I can throw on quickly and that require little fuss. Flats have become my new best friend, leaving me to wonder if I will actually ever wear heels to do random nonsensical things again. 

Oh, how a child changes one!

90's baby

top, choker- asos

jeans, flats- zara

blazer- urban outfitters

Throwing a blazer over a strappy bralette is a great way to make night wear more daytime appropriate. I turned up the casualness of this outfit by pairing it with mom jeans and flat chunky sandals. The top is so sexy and revealing, I just wanted to make it more appropriate for daytime. I kept make up to a minimum with some brown lipstick. I also painted my nails brown. My choker is s cute, it says 'GIRL' on it. See close ups and details on my INSTAGRAM account.

As of today

I sincerely apologize for the humongous lag in posts! I miss blogging and can not wait to start posting outfits again, fixing up the store and my Facebook account , and beginning an Instagram account.

Time has been slipping away from me. Being a mother is a full-time job...no scratch that because with a full- time job you get lunch breaks, sick days, vacation days, and the ability to actually leave the job and go home, and although motherhood is much more rewarding, it is not as forgiving.

My little one turns 1 next week friday. Insane. I know right? I still can't believe I am a mother, let alone the mother of a soon to be toddler. I still feel like a child myself. Who am I to be responsible for the well-being of any life form but that of a pet? What could I possibly have to teach this tiny person that is already so perfect?

She is what baby books would call a 'difficult' or 'spirited' baby. She is a challenge. I am a low energy, easily stimulated introvert (being around others, though enjoyable, is draining for me).  She is this tremendous burst of energy. To put it into perspective, I can, and often do, get overstimulated just from reading a book. I often have to take mini-breaks from reading because the excitement that I get from an awesome book is too much for me to bear in one sitting. Crazy, I know, but I kid you not. Same thing with fashion magazines, I get so excited and if it is a really good magazine, I have to read it in pieces because a good outfit alone is enough to get me excited/ stimulate me, several on one page?? Much too much to take in one sitting!. My little one spends all day screaming joyfully while running back and forth in her walker throughout the house. It is the cutest thing to see, but dear God, it is draining.

It is over 90 degrees out here every single day with matching percentages in humidity, much too hot and stuffy to go outside. We have been stuck inside for quite awhile. I haven't had the energy to put outfits together and blog, though, I have not stopped thinking about it for a second.
It is getting a little cooler in the evening so I am planning on getting an outfit post up here real soon.

My birthday passed at the beginning of the month, and with the accumulated birthday money I have been able to purchase some really awesome pieces. I have some killer outfits in mind and I cannot wait to share! I truly do enjoy sharing outfits and thoughts with other fashion lovers! You guys are seriously like my friends, I have a good time reading and responding to comments. I can't wait to connect with you guys again real soon!

Without further ado, here are updated pics of my gorgeous angel. I like to say that she is my little piece of heaven, even when she is raising hell!

Her morning face.

pppsssshhhh.... look at that attitude. She looks like she is judging someone's outfit.

This is her bored.

Why I am in love with the "Ugly sandal"

Just a year ago, you could have birkenstock and I would have said "eww". 

I admit, I failed to see the fashion potential in thses infamously normcore, plain, and well, plain ugly flats. However, I can now say that "I have seen the light" and will never shit on them again. 
Birkenstocks and Birkenstock-ish sandals, were once for the fashion impaired and lazy, but no more. The truth is the actually require some thought and consideration. Styled right, they can make any outfit seem effortlessly cool, styled badly....well, we all know what Birkenstocks styled badly and without thought look like.
They are so versatile. They are so simple that they work with a spectrum of different styles and looks.
They are so comfortable. 'Nough said..
I know they call it a trend but I believe the right style of Birkenstock could be a new classic. They are minimal enough to last several seasons, and go with other trends that come and go.
Again, they are comfortable as hell!

Next up: The ones I have my eye on

Baby Blue

Pearls- LJS/ Dress- Zara

This dress is such a soft, sweet shade of blue that I could not resist it.  I adore its simple cut. There is a  slight sheerness in upper portion of the back that makes is sexy.  Great to through on and go, and still look put together.

lace and pearls

LJS PEARLS/ Zara dress & flats

Now Selling!

These babies are gorgeous and are now for sale at my SHOP. 

I won't sell anything I don't personally love, with that being said, I ha to keep a pair in each color for myself!

I kid not, I was honestly not planning on holding onto any of the merchandise for myself but these fit my style so perfectly.

I like things clean and minimal (or so I am learning about myself), so much so that I am not even that big on accessories. Most of my posts show me wearing little to no accessories, I feel that if you need accessories to make an outfit work then the outfit, then the outfit wasn't that good to begin with anyway. If I wear accessories it is a compliment, not a supplement. These babies, definitely compliment...almost everything!  They are so amazing that I decided to stock up on them in color as well (that will be coming soon!)

I am not saying this to pressure you into purchasing, but I honestly do only have a very small quantity of these pearls.

Feel free to ask me questions about the merchandise right here in the comments or email me at: Lolajaro@aol.com

6.24.14

heels, dress- Zara/ Pearls- LJS (coming soon)

All black everything- simplicity

Pearls coming by the end of the week! The black is just as chic as the white.